“Radical humility” is something often left out of a negotiation. Our mindsets going into negotiation are usually, “How can I get what I want out of this?” What if instead, our mindset was, “How can I give the most?”
On a recent episode of Negotiations Ninja podcast, I spoke with David Meltzer, CEO and co-founder of Sports1 Marketing and author of multiple best-selling books, including Connected to Goodness: Manifest Everything You Desire in Business and Life.
David attributes his negotiation success to abundance: the idea that there is enough of everything for everyone. If you go into a deal with ego and the drive to win and be separate and superior, there is always the chance that you will lose. David shifted his paradigm, “The more I give away, the more that I win,” he says. “Ironically, when I do that, I get so much more.”
Compassionate capitalism is an idea that many see as impossible. Capitalism is all about more. It’s about taking as much as you can to increase revenue continually. How can all of this taking be compassionate?
David says, you can have it all. If you put the person you are negotiation with, selling to, speaking to, ahead of what you are trying to sell or gain, if you think about their needs and what they value, there is still potential for you to make money and help them at the same time.
We live in a consumerist society. We like to make money so we can buy things to make our lives easier, more comfortable, and more enjoyable. We want capitalism to provide us that opportunity. But we don’t want to be duped, we don’t want to waste our money, and we don’t want to be taken advantage of.
“If you challenge yourself to find out what is most valuable, not to you but to the person or company you’re negotiating with, and provide them value in offering them what they need, what you need will come,” says David.
Rather than looking for ways to get more money out of people, look for more ways that you can help people. What can you offer that will bring value to people’s lives? Go into your next negotiation thinking about what could bring the other side/person value. Instead of thinking about what you need, think about how you can help them.
For more on humility in negotiation from David Meltzer, subscribe to Negotiations Ninja podcast and find us on LinkedIn.